REPOST: Grabbing Myself Inappropriately

Reposting another of my "Greatest Hits" from Daventry Blue:




I like playing with my tits.

Seriously. They deserve the love. My chest - my pectorals, if you want to get all manly about it, being that some guys get squirmy saying anything remotely feminine about their bodies - has always been there for me. Even when I have been very ill and have taken weeks, even months off my workout routine to recover, my chest, or some shadow of it, has remained. And when I returned to my workouts my chest has always been the first body area to respond. It has perked right up. Good morning! For this reason, it's always been my favorite area to hit in the gym, and maybe, in some deep psychological way, this is the reason why I'm so drawn to illustrations of heavily boobified men.

Not that I'm the only one. Straight guys are just as interested in another guy's huge chest as us gays. I remember once in college, when I was at the peak of my bodybuilding, I was running on a treadmill. The treadmills in the college gym were lined up against a three foot high dividing wall between the weight room and the basketball courts. Sometimes in the spring, when it rained, the baseball team would have their practice inside. One day, as I was running, wearing a so-tight-it's-silly tank top, I caught the eye of one of the players at batting practice. He was directly opposite me ad so I was unavoidable to his sight. Well, he was nearly killed by the first pitch. I had distracted him. I couldn't help but smile as he tried to recompose himself under a wealth of embarrassment. Ah, good times...

This is not to say that I don't appreciate the rest of the male form and don't try just as hard to achieve some sort of symmetry between the rest of my body and my chest. But, as any fitness fiend will tell you, every body's makeup is different and some parts just don't respond to training as well as others. It's rare to find anyone who has perfect symmetry without some cosmetic help. If you do find them, give them a dirty look from me.

My thighs respond well to my workouts, though with my weak ankle I can't hit them as hard as I'd like. Everyone wants a nice ass. For me, "nice ass" means bubbly and round. I was recently watching the Disney film Tangled. Cute movie. I really liked the animation style. While watching I found myself quite enamored at first by the hero, Flynn Rider. Yet when he descended the walls of Rapunzel's tower I noticed, "Somebody done erased that boy's ass!"What is it with Disney? None of the heroes have much booty at all. But the villains? Well, the two twins chasing Flynn were...Yowzer! And lets not any of us forget about Gaston fromBeauty & the Beast! ("He's such a doggone strong and handsome brute!") I guess, though, until Patrick Fillion starts making animated films we'll never see truly objectified men in that art form.

That's a shame too, because... wait...what was I saying? I was just distracted when I gave myself a reach-around. Ah, yes. T&A. It's not just for straight men anymore.